My Daily Rant - Holiday Edition

 

So I walk into Target the other day to buy my soon to be Kindergardner some school supplies. (Insert YAY here) And I see something so horrifying that I almost lose my McCafe. No, there wasn't a kidnapping taking place. No, police weren't shooting a shoplifter. What I saw was far more horrific. Halloween decorations and costumes. Now, while you scratch your head and think about that, let me remind you of something. IT"S FREAKIN JULY! (Well technically it's August but it was still July when this happened).

Don't get me wrong. I am not a scrooge. Ilike to celebrate as much as the next person. And I will admit that you have to get the good costumes early before they're all gone. But seriously people? Give me a freakin break. In fact, I was deemed "Celebrating Christie" by a former coworker at The Little Red Hen.

However, I feel this has gone too far. I am quite certain that this is someone's idea of "stimulating the economy". It's right up there with "Cash for Clunkers" and the "First time homebuyers" credit. Hey there Mr. Politician, when people have been out of work for months and their big spending decision this month is whether to pay the electric or the gas, this crap is not stimulating their economy. I'm no economics major but I've been on the opposite end of a rich politician's life long enough to know that.

Ok, I digress and I promised no more political discussions on here. So back to the holiday crap. Seriously? Now I worked at The Little Red Hen for about 7 years. And there, we did have to start putting holiday stuff out fairly early in the year for one reason and one reason only. If we didn't start early, we wouldn't get it all out in time as this was a very time consuimg affair at this store. However, this only makes me feel that that person bought too much shit for her store. (Love her to pieces, think she is fabulous, but that's my opinion.) And perhaps working at that store for so long is partly what turned me into the partial scrooge you probably all think I am now. I remember when I first started working there, they hired their holiday help in October, and the Christmas Season did not really start until Black Friday. (For those of you non shoppers, that's The Day After Thanksgiving....and don't even get me going, that is a topic for a whole rant in itself!) After about 4 years, I had coworkers that would start playing Christmas music in freakin September. I used to love Christmas music. It brought to mind great memories of baking cookies with my mom and Grandma. Now, when I hear Christmas music, it brings homicidal tendencies to mind and I pretty much just want to claw peoples' eyes out. Just ask Shawna and Mandi when they made me listen to it last year.

Now, I would like you all to know that this is not to say that I don't enjoy holidays, or decorating, and all that stuff. But the phrase "for everything there is a season" comes to mind. And in my household, these are the holiday rules.

No Halloween Decorations until October 1st.

Thanksgiving/Fall decorations can go up the day after Halloween.

No Christmas decorations until the day after Thanksgiving.

Christmas music is pretty much reserved for the week prior to Christmas and/or Holiday parties.

And for heaven's sake, if you still have your Christmas lights on in February, don't be surprised when someone pimp smacks you. You had it coming. (Hey Brian, did I use that term correctly? I'm new at the new lingo!)

I imagine that some of you overly eager holidayians are thinking, "WTF chuck? That's only like a month for each holiday!" Yes people, that is the point. Catch up. Think about it, how often have you put your decorations up so early that by the time the holiday actually arrives, all you can think about is starting a bonfire with them and roasting marshmallows over the ashes of Santa? Oh that's just me? Hmm.

And Christmas Cookies......well you can eat them year round. I do not discriminate against snack food for any reason.